Homemade lemon pie

Here is my recipe for the most lemony, fragrant and delicious homemade lemon pie or shortbread crust lemon bars that you have ever tasted

The humming of the TV is my favorite company when ironing. In this way, I combine a pleasant activity with a useful one: I iron clothes and learn something new from different TV shows. But this time I didn’t manage to iron, because as soon as I turned on the iron, an extravagant woman appeared on the TV screen. She was dressed in a bright dress with geometric patterns; her long hair was braided in two braids, and her face was covered with a ton of makeup. While the TV show presenter was finishing an interview with another guest, the extravagant woman was drinking tea and munching appetizingly on a homemade lemon pie. I was hoping to learn a new recipe, but no… the woman selfishly finished a whole piece, wiped her mouth with a napkin, then went straight to the camera and, burying her nose in the screen, said a phrase that like a magnet pulled me away from the iron and put me on the sofa in front of the TV: “My name is Hasdrubala. I know what the cause of all your problems is and how to solve them easily!”…Wow! (I thought)…

Could you pass by such vital information? I couldn’t either…

In a word, everything turns out to be ingeniously simple! According to Hasdrubala, all our problems are due to improper care of our hair! Yes, you read it right. And I used to naively think that problems arise because of misunderstandings with family and friends, the global economic crisis, various epidemics and the like… I would never have thought that my hair is to blame for all my troubles!

Hasdrubala was constantly poking her index finger (with a huge golden ring with a bright pebble) from the screen and repeated: “Remember these rules! And your problems will be solved by themselves! ”

At that moment, her face resembled lightning, and the tone of her voice sounded like thunder piercing the night sky during a terrible downpour… who knows, maybe the famous Carthaginian commander Hasdrubal Barkid was her ancestor and passed on his charisma to her through genes… but at that moment I was afraid to breathe loudly so that the extravagant lady would not bark angrily at me from the screen, and in my thoughts, there was an assumption that if Mrs. Hazdrubala had been my chemistry teacher at school, I would still remember the subtleties of each chemical formula and compound even at night.

So, to get rid of all the problems, follow these rules:

Never cut your hair. Even if you are uncomfortable with knee-length hair, be patient! For some reason, Hasdrubala emphasized the word patient, pronouncing it slowly with a long accent on “a”. Okay, for the sake of solving problems, anyone can be patient.

Why can’t we get our hair cut? Everything is obvious! Hair has several extremely important functions:

1. Did you not know that our hair is a kind of antenna connecting us with space and charging us with energy? I didn’t know either, but Hasdrubala says that even our ancestors knew this many years ago … (That’s why I’m always sleepy in the morning … not because I like to watch movies until midnight and then and in the morning I have to get up at 6.45 to dress my children, feed them and take them to school. The reason for my drowsiness is that I cut my hair! Hasdrubala insisted that the ideal length of a woman’s hair is knee-length. It is this length that will correctly transmit your signals into space. Poor me… what should I do with my shoulder-length hair now… well, in rainy weather, when the air humidity goes off scale, my hair still resembles antennae that stick out in different directions, but their length is not enough to transmit signals … maybe I should start growing my hair, because communication with space is vital for everyone, isn’t it?
2. Hair keeps the memory of a person and here again… bingo! That’s why I am so forgetful, sometimes I come to the kitchen to wash the dishes, but on the way I find some kind of cookies, apple tart or homemade lemon pie and that’s it … I sit, chew the pie and wash it down with coffee. It’s all my haircut’s fault! Short hair is a short memory. Here I thought about bald men and how difficult it is for them to live (according to Hasdrubala)
3. Long hair is a great intuition (I’m fine with intuition, but I’m worried about the poor bald men again…) now I understand modern fashion and why bald men often grow long beards … everyone adapts as best he can …

Another important aspect that Hasdrubala emphasized: you can’t dye your hair! Here physics came into play: our eyes see the color of any object as a result of absorbing waves. When light hits an object, this object absorbs waves of a certain length, and the rest of the waves are reflected from the object (the reflected waves are exactly what we see). If yellow waves are reflected from an object, we see it yellow. Hair also absorbs only the color that we need along with its energy. What color is it? Who knows… we only see the one that is reflected, not the one that was absorbed. According to this phenomenon, you may see yourself as a brunette, but in fact you are a blonde, or maybe your hair is blue by nature, and everyone sees it as black … Everything is very confusing here, Hasdrubala did not go into details, but again noted with her piercing voice: “dyed hair is the source of your problems!” How can I, a dyed blonde, continue to live with this knowledge now?

Hasdrubala gave many other tips on washing your hair with yolk with vinegar or laundry soap (after yolk and vinegar mixture, the smell from your hair will be felt several miles away and, believe me, it will be far from a French refined fragrance … and after the laundry soap, you will definitely have a whole station of antennae on your head that will be impossible to lay or even just comb … so think carefully whether such suffering is worth any connections with space … haha).

The extravagant lady talked and talked, described in detail different methods of braiding braids, recalled the new moon and the like … and I watched this comedy, and laughed so much that even if the antennae did not grow on my head, but with laughter I pumped up my abdominal muscles. I didn’t listen to other nonsense, because my thoughts switched to the homemade lemon pie from the beginning of the TV show and, forgetting about ironing, I went to the kitchen to bake it…

The most delicious homemade lemon pie

This lemon pie will not solve all the problems of the universe, but it will easily improve some aspects of your life: it will definitely give you a good mood and a delicious day.

This recipe can be used to make both homemade lemon pie and shortbread crust lemon bars.

The crispy shortbread dough goes perfectly with the delicate lemon pie filling, and its fantastic taste and aroma is a real ode to lemons!

Making this pie is easy, it’s not easy to wait until it has cooled in the fridge, but the wait is worth it!

And for success and solving problems that depend on you, I advise you to use the simple formula “2-1-2”:

– 2: the secret of your success is always in 2 words: right decisions

– 1: How do you know which decisions are right? The answer is in 1 word: experience

– 2: How to get experience? The answer is again in 2 words: wrong decisions.

That’s all. It doesn’t matter if your hair is long or short, dyed or natural color … the main thing is that you like it! In any case, we cannot do anything with the length of our life, but we can definitely change its width, depth and make it tasty!

Use all the surprises presented to you by life (good and bad) for your advantage…  And if life has given you lemons, make lemonade out of them, or better yet, bake a homemade lemon pie!

Ingredients:

(shortbread crust)

• 2cups + 3Tbsp (350g) flour
• ½ cup + 3Tbsp (150g) butter at room temperature
• ½ cup + 3Tbsp (150g) sugar
• grated zest of 1 lemon
• 2 eggs
• 3 ¼ tsp (15g) baking powder

(lemon pie filling)

• ¾ cup + 3Tbsp (200g) sugar
• ½ cup (60g) cornstarch (you can substitute it with potato starch)
• grated zest of 1 lemon
• juice of 2 lemons
• 1 egg
• 2cups + 1Tbsp (500ml) water

Homemade lemon pie recipe

Prepare the shortbread dough: put together flour, sugar, butter and baking powder. Mix everything until crumbs form

Add grated lemon zest and eggs. Knead the dough and leave it in the fridge for 30 minutes.

Now it’s time to make the lemon pie filling: mix sugar, starch and grated lemon zest. Add the lemon juice, egg and cold water

Mix well and cook over medium heat (stirring constantly) until thickened. Let it cool

Take the dough out of the fridge and divide it into 2 parts (one should be slightly larger than the other). Roll the larger part of the dough and put it in a baking form with high sides.

Put the cream on the dough. Roll out the smaller part of the dough and cover the top of the pie with it. Fasten the edges well so that the cream does not leak out when baking. Prick the surface of the pie with a fork

Preheat the oven to 350F (180C) and bake the homemade lemon pie for 40 minutes. Leave it to cool completely and put it in the fridge for at least 5 hours (this will allow the cream to harden and it will not leak out when slicing). Bon appetit!

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